.September 22, 2009 @ 1:06 AM Y
princessangel
I'm sleepy but still blogging from my HP lolx..
I realize something.. one of his ex actually kinna block a lot of setting towards me.. if she think she is smart, she's wrong.. I can always stalk via laogong's facebook.. go ahead to block laogong as well.. I'll be most happy if she'll do so.. :)
next year dec, more or less set?? nobody shall snatch him away from me ever again! :P
.August 23, 2009 @ 11:55 PM Y
princessangel
From
here..
"Major depressive disorder (also known as clinical depression, major depression, unipolar depression, or unipolar disorder) is a
mental disorder characterized by an all-encompassing
low mood accompanied by
low self-esteem, and loss of interest or pleasure in normally enjoyable activities.
...............
Major depression is a serious illness that affects a person's family and personal relationships, work or school life, sleeping and eating habits, and general health.
[1] Its impact on functioning and well-being has been equated to that of chronic medical conditions such as
diabetes.
[2]A person suffering a
major depressive episode usually
exhibits a very low mood that pervades all aspects of life and an inability to experience pleasure in activities that formerly were enjoyed. Depressed people may be
preoccupied with, or ruminate over, thoughts and feelings of worthlessness, inappropriate guilt or regret, helplessness, hopelessness, and self-hatred. [3] Other symptoms include
poor concentration and memory (especially in those with
melancholic or
psychotic features),
[4] withdrawal from social situations and activities, reduced sex drive, and thoughts of death or suicide.
Insomnia is common: in the typical pattern, a person wakes very early and is unable to get back to sleep.
[5] Hypersomnia, or oversleeping, is less common.
[5] Appetite often decreases, with resulting weight loss, although increased appetite and weight gain occasionally occur.
[3] The person may report multiple physical symptoms such as
fatigue, headaches, or digestive problems; physical complaints are the most common presenting problem in developing countries according to the
World Health Organization's criteria of depression.
[6] Family and friends may notice that the person's behavior is either
agitated or
lethargic.
[5]"
I think im starting to have the systom i highlighted in red..
Im feeling scare.. But tats really the cause, for the last few days...
Oh well, lets see...
.August 11, 2009 @ 11:30 PM Y
princessangel
I guess laogong is demanding a update from me, cuz he has been asking me why didnt i update..
Every monday awaiting for weekend.
How tough life is, to wait for time slowly passes by..
Laogong still hasnt gotten consent from his parent for us to ROM on his birthday on 2010.
I guess he's scare of his parent lol.. Im certain he didnt even show his mama the proposal ring he got for me..
Im sure his mama will say everything is too fast..
BUT, i just wanna be with laogong everyday.. How nice to hug him to bed everyday, even though he seldom hug me when he's sleeping though.. *sobx sobx*
This sunday is our 9th monthsary. Time flies..
We agreed in the first place not to celebrate monthsary, but it seems tat we are having good food always, on our monthsary. LOL!
For the least, we didnt waste $$ buying each other gift.. XD
Food is something to enjoy, and grow fat, follow by diet. HAHA!
.August 4, 2009 @ 1:49 AM Y
princessangel
Today browse & browse, den saw a forum discussing about whether your bf still love his ex.. While reading those points, my heart started to jump terribly hard, tat i could hardly breathe.. Immediately, i smsed laogong not to contact any of his ex anymore.. After his replied (on good side of course), i called him and started crying over the phone..
On a happier note (on my side), laogong said he will throw away everything he had with his ex (since i requested it), especially the ring which she proudly "design" the wordings. And im going to dump it down the outside bin to make sure nobody can retrieve it, unless you are the trash collector.
Im evil, so what? Im selfish, so what? Im mean, so what?
I dun ever feel im wrong in wanting my laogong to have his heart to only have me & ME!
Im not going to share my laogong with any girls/woman/ladies out there.
Like wad i said to laogong before, i will give both of them a slap IN PUBLIC if someday he really betray me..
Whenever im angry, i will either hit myself or him (poor laogong), so if he really did something wrong against my back, i will be most angry. Conclusion, i will just hit anyone i deem as doing me wrong.
Yes, i have mental problem. Tats the fact, and i admit to it!
I will proudly/gladly announce it to the whole world once i throw those stuffs away.
EVERYTHING, not even soft copies is allow!!
.August 3, 2009 @ 1:00 AM Y
princessangel
*hoping laogong sleeping soundly & dreaming of me now*
-hehehehehe-
While playing games (yeap lots of it) at one go, suddenly feel so lonely..
I guess im used to having Laogong to be by my side when im playing games..
Its the first time im playing games till so late since i dun have to work tml (and the whole week of it). ><"!
Laogong, i loves you lots lots..
Sorry tat i still cant trust tat you will stay by me forever..
Sorry tat im always over-sensitive..
I always blame tat its your fault tat you hasnt given me enough security..
But its actually my own mind making me thinking nonsense..
Even when i had nightmare about laogong leaving me etc, i will blame everything on laogong..
I have no idea how to love a person completely..
Even when he browse through his ex comment on facebook, i will feel jealous.
I become negative and think he might leave me for her someday..
Or perhaps he might leave me for anyone else someday..
I become so moodly and wanting to pick a fight again..
Like what laogong said, im in love with him deeply..
I would never run away from him..
But, i dun feel the same towards him..
I always thinking he will leave me someday..
*sigh*
Told laogong i wan our ROM to be on his bday..
Reason being, if someday we get divorce, he will still remember me for LIFE.
I know im selfish to wan him to remember me when if someday we divorce.
But i still hope tat day will never come, so he will not have bitter bday every year..
Anyways, so sleepy now..
I cant wait for weekend to come, so i can hug laogong to bed at night..
Laogong, i love you lots!
.July 30, 2009 @ 11:35 PM Y
princessangel
Laogong said, his mama pop up alot of housing issues to him again. Which make him very vexed.
Sigh, why must his mama "make life difficult" for us??
Izzit bcuz his mama dun like me, doesnt want us to marry fast, tats why pop all these issues to him?
Told mama about it.. Mama said she feels im too young to marry too.
But mama marry with papa is, papa age of 27, mama age of 23.
If next year we really marry, he is already age of 27 which im already age of 22. So i dun think in anyway im early.
In certain ways, im on the same path as my parent ne..
Laogong said he will give up his oversea trip in order to save more $$ for our marriage + house.
YAY!
Im going to prepare bread for work start of aug, so i can save more $$ for our marriage + house too. And yeap, cut down on my fav bubble tea as well. ><"!
Ganbatte both of us ne!
Laogong, i love you lots! *muackie*
.July 29, 2009 @ 11:04 PM Y
princessangel
Sorry but i have to scold laogong BAKA here!!
How could he think im with him cuz of money! Saying i dun wan him after getting handphone?
T______T
But well, misunderstanding have been solved. -case closed-
He explained for his reaction and i explained for my decision..
Stupid misunderstanding always makes us quarrel for nothing..
Anyways, i hope nothing of this sort will happen again..
Cuz i love laogong lots lots LOTS!
Anyways, laogong's mama want us to buy a flat before we marry.. But is like, where got $$? No idea wad's his mama thinking but both of us are really saving hard for our marriage first..
Even though buying a flat can use CPF but, first installment, furniture etc still need cash.. Must start to calculate both our finance this weekend. Must plan ahead as what his mama suggested!
But of cuz, tats bcuz i wanna stay with laogong soon! =D
Hoping to hug him to bed everything, saying good morning & good night face-to-face everyday.
Kyaa, cant wait for tat day to come! =D
.July 26, 2009 @ 2:39 PM Y
princessangel
Im feeling so fortunate!
Laogong paid 50% for my new phone so tat i can have the same phone as him! =D
Had very big quarrel yesterday. But when laogong saw my hand hurt, he immediately show his concern which really shocked and touched me! =D
This morning, when i wake up, laogong asked me am i hungry, do i need him to cook noodle for me to eat?
Laogong didnt went down to buy breakfast (well tibits..) cuz he said he wanna save money!~
Laogong went goggle on wedding thingy last night cuz he cant wait to tie me down to be his wife!
Ahhh, Mr Lim laogong, i love you lots lots LOTS! *muackie*
.July 21, 2009 @ 12:49 AM Y
princessangel
Today, i specially miss Laogong..
I wonder why..
On my way home, laogong called me asking me where i am. He was worried for me!
He's so sweet!! =D
He said he read my blog. He said im silly. He said he wun leave me..
*huggies*
Laogong, i LOVES you LOTS! *muackies*
Hope i can go home early tml. Cuz i wanna chat with laogong!~ T.T
.July 20, 2009 @ 2:36 AM Y
princessangel
I was sleeping and had this nightmare, which makes me feel so sad.. And i started sobbing myself in my room..
Its always the case, when im so happily into my own world, and sad imagination came up..
Intend to write this before i forget next morning.. ><"!
==============================================================
This occur to me tat.. If one day, my best friend came to me and said she is with my laogong, and he wanted to break up so they can be together.. Yeap, he doesnt dare to tell me directly cuz he is with my best friend, someone whom i trust most in my life.
When i know of the news, i wasnt surprise, cuz laogong have been treating me pretty coldly. I already suspected something fishy. I didnt blame anyone of them, cuz i know, my best friend in term of EVERYTHING, she was better den me. I think, i would rather lost to my best friend den to outside woman whom i will definitely assume WILL NOT BE BETTER den me.
I told her, i will wish her all the best. Cuz laogong is really a good guy, and she is really a good girl. But i really, cant accept it this way, and ask her to give me some time to cool down. I asked for her shoulder for me to sobx.. While sobbing, i told her i really is wishing them the best and will not blame them. All i would blame, is myself for not being a good girlfriend, tats why he will choose her over me.. I told her, if its other girl, i might give both of them a slap and hate laogong forever. But since its her, i wouldly greatly accept him as my brother-in-law.
==============================================================
Well, im sobbing badly now, i could hardly see clearly le..
I guess the rest of the nightmare, is for him to ask me himself tml.
And let him hear me cry MORE!
Hope the nightmare dun continue, i want to sleep! T.T